as i sit, literally in the midst of piles of clothes, with a glass of wine in me and listening to some sara bareilles (always an inspiration for me), i feel like it's time for me to get on my pedestal.
now, the story of the pedestal dates back to last easter, when my best friend courtney drunkenly stood up on the ottoman at a party at a friends house, and proceeded to lecture us on how the guy who dumped her made the biggest mistake of his life, and that he'd come crawling back (which he did). ever since that infamous night, my friends and i have all had moments where we need to just vent about the injustices in our lives.
i think i deserve a good relationship that works out. i'm a beautiful, smart and fun young woman. i work hard for what i want, but i know how to make sacrifices for people when i need too. i love to laugh, i'm have no shame, and i have the perfect sized breasts. i drink beer, not coolers, and i could play mariokart on my gamecube all day everyday if that were a realistic option. how am i not someone's dream woman!?
let's examine my recent history with men. kevin dumped me, for reasons i'm still unclear of, and now he hates my guts, also for reasons for which i am unclear. nathan and i failed at the long distance over the summer thing, and then he only wanted me when i wasn't single. daniel and i never seem to want to give it another shot at the same time, and the emotional on and off has warn us both down so much that i think it's safe to say that chapter is done. max lives in germany.
i think it's about time i met a good guy, and that it worked out. i'm not asking for forever, but i'd like someone to restore my faith in relationships (or frankly, men in general).
i don't need a lecture about how i don't need a man (i just want one! i'm a really really good kisser, and i'd hate for that to go to waste!) I just want someone to give me a reason to think there is someone out there for me!
ugh. sometimes everything is lame.
- ella faye
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