i have boybrain these days i think.
if i had to go back and do it all again, i'd like to say i would.
but putting an expiry date on a relationship really stresses me out.
max and i had to finally discuss the logistics of this last night.
i think breakups in general are stressful things.
but usually, either i want them to happen, or they blindside me. there isn't usually this dark gloomy cloud of pending breakupness looming over my head for so long.
next, begs the question, of future visits.
what is better, a clean break and that's it, and it's over, or the potential to rekindle a quick fling during trips to see each other?
he and i disagree on this topic.
also, although this remains undiscussed between the two of us, i intend to come and visit here in the summer, but he openly has no intentions on making the trip to see me.
see? i knew i'd be the loser in this relationship. but this was a sidebar.
don't get me wrong, yesterday was awesome, i'm happy, and i know i will move on and find another great guy in the future.
but for now, i just want this lame uneasy feeling to go away, and frankly it probably won't until i've moved back to school for the summer.
why do i always put myself in these situations,
as one of my housemates Jane would say " I'm going nuts! I'm crazy!"
- ella faye