Thursday, 31 March 2011

when you're older, you will understand.

I'm so sick of poop on the floor.

My life has such a new meaning for the term "shit show"

Like seriously?!

So, Miss M has developed the habit of pooping on the floor and smearing it all over the place! I went to find her this morning, and once again, this was the scenario I find. She reached out, and before I could move my arm, I also had poop smeared all over myself.

You know how sometimes the most awful and ridiculous things happen and you just laugh?

This was not one of those times.

I was so fed up! For real?! I'm tired, SUPER stressed about this paper for a class I'm taking, feeling lonely and overwhelmed, and now I'm covered in someone else's poo.


But, I had to just smile and take it in stride. As much as this job can wear you down, you have to not let it show. I couldn't just break down in tears in front of Miss M, it would then become overwhelming and upsetting for her, I had to just send her to change, and toughen up and clean the bathroom.

I feel like this was a big moment for me. It might have actually been one of the lowest moments I've had at this job so far. I wanted so bad to just laugh at the story and move on with my day. But I am just so tired.

I'm sick of poop on the floor. I'm sick of stress related to school. I'm sick of grieving for my father.

You can't always laugh everything off, but you can still trek forward, smile, take it in stride and decide to be bigger than the issue you're facing.

I learned a lot today. In some sick, confusing way, I'm thankful that there was poop on the floor today.

I have to learn that it's okay to not always be perfectly okay. I don't always have to pretend nothing gets to me, but I can still overcome it in a way that isn't totally embarrassing.

Now, whenever you're stressed or sick of something, remember, it's just poop on the floor. Clean it up, have a shower and take the time you need to be okay, when you feel the time is right. You don't have to break down at work, but take a deep breath, finish your day, and pig out on hagen daz when you get home, and cry while watching "A Walk to Remember".

But you might want to avoid chocolate ice cream, it's too much like poop.

- ella faye

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