Tuesday 29 March 2011

there was another time in my life, before i met you.

Today, after a long weekend home, visiting my friends and family, I decided I felt refreshed enough for EPIC BATTLE OF ME VS THE PEE CHAIR TAKE TWO,

Here's how it went down.

The evil chair started wafting it's scent of urine and demons towards the kitchen, I knew as I scrubbed the counter that the time had come.

I pulled on my nitrile latex-free gloves with a grin, I've totally got this.

Lysol wipes in hand once again, I attack the chair. I wiped till my fingers are numb. The sticky blue substance (which I still cannot remove) has now grown hair. I pluck each hair out, knowing from experience with my eyebrows, how much that really hurts.

Today my main focus is the cushion. I expose each crevasse, and each crevasse's crevasse. The scent of evil still resonating from the seat cushion, I plunged myself into my work.

Once again, I broke a sweat, however this time, only Jay was home, and he was much too focused on "Let's Make a Deal" to notice me.

I decide I need to take the foam out of the cushion, to fabreeze the inside. I hunt down the zipper, buried deep in the side, and follow it to the top. So much pee has been on this chair, that the zipper is rusted shut. I take the lysol to this, hoping and praying that I will remove some of the grime crusted on to this zipper, with no prevail.

This chair will continue to smell of pee until I get into this cushion. Watch out pee chair.

This ain't over till I say it's over... (to be continued at a later date when the saga continues)

- ella faye

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