baby can you hear the message i am sending? (love me like the world is ending)

i know i'm not creative,

but boys are lame.

alongside the whole keegan drama, which has not been resolved, however, I can guarantee you 100% I will not be naming any of my daughters Victoria, because the name is ruined for me by Keegan's controlling, dramatic and obnoxious girlfriend. But that doesn't say all that much as I already was not a big fan of the name, it sounds to harsh, you know?

anyways, back to what I was saying. I developed a new mystery boy. He's great, exactly the kind of guy I could see myself with. He made me happy and feel safe, and we were developing quite the friendship. But he ruined it, he said something lame. I can't give anymore details because I refuse to give identifying information as enough people who are mutual friends read this blog that they might already know who I'm talking about.

Either way, on top of that, this is super selfish I know, but a good friend of mine is happily considering getting back together with her boyfriend (flashback to me and daniel), and unfortunately, I'm not his biggest fan (flashback to everyone's opinion of me and daniel), and I'm frustrated because I don't want to see her get hurt again (flashback to exactly what she told me about me and daniel), and since things with Daniel are so fine and dandy (I wish!), I just have concern.

Speaking of Daniel, I miss him. We're on speaking terms again sometimes, but hardly on a regular basis. I just miss having that best friend, who's been through everything with me. He would give me logic and understand about this whole Keegan thing, (probably not the mystery boy because that's a more touchy subject) and then I would feel better and understand better why this happened. Then he would take me out to Starbucks for a White Chocolate Mocha and we'd play pool by my rules (which allow me to take a second try anytime I say "oh no!")

I guess I'm just a little anti-man these days. Maybe I'll just hold off of boys until I apply to be on the Bachelor and win the rich guy. My seductress ways have not been successful with the last two mystery boys, but I haven't lost faith. I know I'm beautiful, hilarious and awesome. Someone else is bound to see that soontimes!

- ella faye