so sing it out with me, and then let it go.

i am thankful for friends.

in the midst of my heart break and devastation, i have had the most amazing support systems.

i might be eating ridiculous amounts of junk food, but my heart ache is being consoled.

i might even add, that my friends are making sacrifices to make time for me when i am in a time of trial.

something that my boyfriend can not even accomplish these days.

my friend meg helped me clarify today that it's not that michael isn't trying to make time for me, it's that he's spreading himself too thin. michael can not let anyone down, but that let's me down.

it's not that it's i need him to make more breaks for me in his busy schedule, i need him to give some things up completely to make me a priority. i need him to give me freedom to have him close when i need, instead of texting him saying i'm having an awful day and need him to visit me, and getting booked into an appointment like slot of time at his nearest convenience.

but i can't make him want that. i can only pine after him.

ughhhhhh.

life is annoying sometime.

- ella faye

i do love him lots still.